हिंदी में पढ़े : क्या विवाह आवश्यक है ?

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Read: Part-2

Read: Part -3

«“Marriage is not necessary for every person. But if you choose to marry, you should be prepared to make the relationship work.”»

This is perhaps one of the most personal questions in the entire discussion—

Does every person really need to get married?

For a long time, society’s answer was almost always an unquestioned, collective “yes.”

A certain age would come…
Marriage would happen…
A family would be formed…
Children would follow…

And this was considered the normal, almost only, path through life.

But can every person’s life really follow the same path?

Perhaps not.

For one person, marriage may become the most beautiful partnership of their life. For another, living alone may be more suitable. And for someone else, marriage may feel right only after several more years.

As we discussed in Part 1 of this series: Marriage Is Not Disappearing, today’s generation may not necessarily be running away from marriage. Perhaps it is simply asking better questions before saying “yes.”

Therefore, placing marriage into only one category—“necessary” or “unnecessary”—may not be appropriate.

When Can Marriage Feel Necessary?

Marriage may become important for a person when—

* There is a genuine desire for a life partner: They truly want to spend their life with someone.
* There is a desire for emotional connection: They want to build a deep bond and a relationship based on trust.
* There is a desire to build a family: Two people are ready to create a shared future and take on the responsibilities that come with it.
* There is a desire for companionship through life’s ups and downs: They want someone with whom they can share success, failure, difficult times, and ordinary days.

As we tried to understand in Part 3: What Is Marriage, After All?, marriage is not merely a celebration. It is the responsibility of living thousands of ordinary days with another human being.

For such a person, marriage is no longer simply a social tradition.

It becomes their own choice.

And a decision made out of genuine personal choice is often accompanied by a greater sense of responsibility.

But Is Life Incomplete Without Marriage?

No.

The idea that a person’s life can be complete only after marriage is a very limited way of looking at life.

A person’s identity is not determined only by their marital status.

Someone can be successful in their career.
They can take care of their family.
They can contribute to society.
They can maintain strong relationships with friends and relatives.
They can dedicate their life to a meaningful purpose.

And they can remain unmarried while doing all of these things.

Therefore—

* Being unmarried is not, by itself, a failure.
* Being married is not, by itself, a guarantee of success.

The quality of a person’s life cannot be determined simply by whether they are married or not.

Getting married later, choosing not to marry, or spending some time living alone is not automatically right or wrong. What matters is whether the decision is made according to the person’s own understanding, wishes, and circumstances.

A Changing Age of Marriage

The age and timing of marriage in India have also been changing.

According to the Government of India’s Ministry of Statistics and Programme Implementation (MOSPI), Youth in India 2022 report, a comparison of NFHS-3 and NFHS-5 data shows that the median age at first marriage among women aged 25–29 increased from 17.4 years in 2005–06 to 19.7 years in 2019–21.

During the same period, the proportion of women aged 25–29 who had married for the first time by age 20 declined from 72.4% to 52.8%.

These figures do not mean that every person wants to delay marriage or that marriage has lost its importance.

But they do indicate that the timing of marriage and life decisions are becoming more diverse than before.

And perhaps this is why the question today is not only—

“Will you get married?”

but also—

“When, why, and under what circumstances?”

Then Why Get Married?

Because for some people, sharing life with a partner is itself a deeply valuable experience.

Having someone—

with whom you can share the small and big things in life…
with whom you can make plans for the future…
in front of whom you can acknowledge your vulnerabilities…
with whom you can stand together during difficult times…

can give marriage a deeper meaning.

But for this, the desire to get married alone is not enough.

The Ability to Stay Together Matters Too

This is something we often forget.

People spend months preparing for a wedding—

clothes,
venue,
food,
guests,
photography…

But do we spend the same amount of time preparing for the relationship for which the celebration is being organized?

Do we learn—

* How to communicate when disagreements arise?
* How to understand each other’s boundaries?
* How to discuss financial responsibilities beforehand?
* How to make expectations about children, careers, and family clear?
* How to support each other during stress and difficult circumstances?
* And most importantly, how to accept our own mistakes?

Perhaps this is what real preparation for marriage looks like.

Preparing for the wedding day may take a few months.
Preparing to sustain a marriage can take a lifetime.

Is Love Alone Enough?

Love is important.

But a long-term relationship requires more than love alone.

Along with love, there must be—

* Respect — for each other’s personality, individuality, and opinions.
* Trust — the foundation that protects a relationship from constant insecurity.
* Communication — the ability to speak honestly and listen carefully.
* Patience — the willingness to face imperfections and difficult days together.
* Responsibility — and the courage to acknowledge one’s own mistakes.

Even two good people will not always agree with each other.

There will be disagreements.
There will be anger.
There may even be disappointment.

But a healthy relationship is not one in which disagreements never happen.

The real question is whether both people try to solve the problem after the disagreement.

Because marriage is not only about sharing the good days.

Sometimes, it is also about getting through the difficult days together.

How Far Should Social Pressure Go?

Family members may offer advice based on their own experiences.

Parents may genuinely worry about their child’s future.

Relatives may have their own opinions.

But ultimately, marriage is to be lived every day by the person who enters that relationship.

Therefore, social advice can be useful…

but social pressure should not become the decision-maker in someone’s life.

If a person wants to marry, they should not step away from it simply because of fear.

And if a person does not want to marry, they should not be forced into it simply because of “What will people say?”

Because society may talk for some time.

But that person has to live the life.

Perhaps This Is the Right Question…

We should stop asking—

“When are you getting married?”

And start asking—

“Do you feel ready for marriage?”

There is a huge difference between these two questions.

The first reflects a social expectation.

The second asks about a person’s inner readiness.

And perhaps the entire story of modern marriage is hidden in this change.

Earlier, the question was—

“When will you get married?”

Now, the question is slowly becoming—

“Who will you marry, why will you marry, and are you ready to make it work?”

This change does not weaken marriage.

Perhaps it makes marriage a relationship that is chosen more thoughtfully.

One Important Point: The Right Age and the Right Preparation

The decision to marry should not be based on age alone.

Child marriage in India has declined over the years. According to the MOSPI report, the proportion of women aged 20–24 who were married before the age of 18 declined from 47.4% in 2005–06 to 23.3% in 2019–21.

However, the issue has not disappeared completely, and the situation can vary significantly across states and social circumstances.

According to UNFPA India’s analysis of NFHS-5 (2019–21), the proportion of women aged 20–24 in Bihar who were married before the age of 18 was 40.8%.

Therefore, when discussing marriage, the question should not only be—

“Should people get married or not?”

It should also be—

“What is the right age, the right situation, and the right level of preparation?”

In the End

Whether marriage is necessary or not may never have one universal answer.

Because every person’s life is different.
Every person’s wishes are different.
Every person’s circumstances are different.

But one thing is certain—

If marriage is your choice, embrace it with your whole heart and with responsibility.

And if marriage is not what you want, do not make such a life-changing decision simply because of social pressure—a decision you may have to live with for years.

Because life is very long…

and marriage is an even bigger decision.

Getting married is not compulsory.

But if you choose to marry, understand the responsibility of becoming a part of another person’s life.

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What Do You Think?

What matters most to you in a long-lasting relationship—love, respect, or emotional readiness?

Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.

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References

1. Ministry of Statistics and Programme Implementation (MOSPI), Government of India — Youth in India 2022 — Data on changing marriage age and marriage patterns based on NFHS-3 and NFHS-5.
2. UNFPA India — Child Marriage in Bihar: Key Insights from the NFHS-5 (2019–21) — Data and analysis related to child marriage in Bihar.
3. UNFPA India — Child Marriage in India: Key Insights from the NFHS-5 (2019–21) — Trends and social context related to child marriage in India.

Disclaimer

This article is intended for general information, discussion, and awareness purposes only. The statistics included in this article are drawn from published reports of relevant government and international organizations and are presented to help readers understand marriage and social changes.

Whether to marry or not is a personal decision. Every individual’s age, personal circumstances, financial situation, family background, and life goals may be different. Therefore, this article should not be considered personal, legal, medical, or psychological advice for any individual.

GossipOfMind does not instruct anyone to marry or not to marry. Our purpose is simply to encourage readers to think about an important social issue, ask meaningful questions, and make their own life decisions with greater awareness and understanding.